Half moon light..

Huh... internship start earlier than people, now know the hard things lo. last time beria ia want to work and work, now... hehe... a bit menyesal la, to say the true. hehe... sometimes i also think why i make myself so hard and work and study, do so many things at once. not like my friend them easy easy pass a day. huh... now really feel tired. hope i can run away from everything that around me, find a place to rest down and take my time to recover. haha....

currently nothing special happen in my life. mmm... yesterday went to a friends birthday dinner. actually starting that time also think wether want go or not, cause not know his friend.. ok la, maybe his sister and one of his friend, other all empty, tak tahu langsung. but wah seh... his friend, mostly macam saya, so talkative. haha.. we have a good chat and a good laugh. none stop. and his mum is very very funny and playful. not like those old mum.. hehe.. and she ask us to sing karaoke with her. geng!!!! eat lo and drink... then... got one girl quite pretty lo. hehe... she look like a hong kong artiste. hehe..

then, what else le. ooo... haiya, money really do not enough o... i this month no simply simply buy things, but still, at the end, used so many money, but tak tahu guna ke mana di. huh... kasihan nya. hehe....

mmm.. about working... report lol.. everytime also last minute say want this report want that report, huh... chiew seng me is also a human, not robot la my dear colleuge men... really sometimes also angry lol.. huh...

what else le....

tak tahu la. today exam geh passage is loneliness. suddenly when i saw that article i feel so interested. haha... maybe talking bout myself. hehe... loneliness..... am i lonely or do i lonely? i sendiri pun tak tahu la. hehe..................

tomorrow will go a singing competition o.. wish me good luck la. hope can get a good esult. hehe...

If thats not me..

Haha.... as usual, start with happy things first.
I had a new petz yo!! is a Hedgehog. you know what is that? remember that cartoon 'Sonic the Hedgehog'? Yup!!! thats it!!! i get a Sonic! haha... its a male, and he is very cute and playful. once u play with him, he will keep on with the play mode and become hyper active. haha... today i bring him to school to show to my groupmate. as usual also, everyone is very curious and happy to see that. everyone play with him and he seems very happy with people. haha... of course, i show it to Ms Annie, my stats tutor and she is so shock. haha.... she said dun let him in the cupboard or else he will bite the whole cupboard and all my cloth! haha... that happen to her family when the guiniepig run out and hide in the cupboard and no one knows about it!!! haha.... but miss, mine is hedgehog la. he is meat base eater la. won't eat wood and cloth. haha...


If thats not me...
huh... this few days really feel so uncomfortable ah... cause everyday also sleep very late and wake up early in the morning. huh... toay have to sleep earlier! haha... body start to pain lol. cause not enough sleep and 'hot'. starting to easily get angry lol. cause body full with heat! bad bad... huh...
really want to ask... are we stay close together because we don't know each other, and separate because we get to know each other?
friends always tell me. argue with their partner. huh... because they know each other too well. maybe thats the problem. know each other too well and didn't belief each others because of it. huh... maybe its true.
this is starting to happen around me. huh... is my fault? or is not my fault? so hard to find out the true... huh.....

Work...
sometimes i think, why i always work so hard but at last i din't get anything leh? huh... for what i work leh? earn how much use how much... huh... but, i like to work. with work i gain money. and i can buy all the things that i want... haha... happy working to me... as always.

Emcee of the dayz~~ Kit teo workshop. Haha...

Huh... at last i am free, back to normal life! haha.....

Yesterday was so so so busy ooo... i mean two dayz back. haha....
Been to school at the morning. Straight until 12pm, have lunch with classmate them. Then go for tvc shooting. huh.... is so stupid to wait until 8pm only shoot, and only 5minutes for the shooting. crazy waiting....
Go for a shooting in Klang Botani club. And is the first time for me to shoot for tvc. haha... the main characters is very nice to talk with. one is a host who had been experience for such a long time where i saw his hosting show since kid, Sean Lee. he was so nice and asked us wether we had in our mind to extent our talent in the field and he would like to help us if we want. he is so funny and, as part timer mass comm lecture, his communicating skill was so so good!! everyone of us really get into the mood to chat with him. and another is a new talent who was so nice and fun to talk with. she was so funny and quite pretty i can say. hehe....
then other who went with me is WS who i had know but had already never meet up for such a long time, and a nice guy who look like one of my bestfriend, and a girl who were the finalist for 2008 astro peugent. wah... to say the true, she really do look like Mirium Yeung. haha...
Then the boss and the director were so funny. they say my hair is such 'geng' and laugh saying where got waiter wit such hair and say i like Leo Ku. and say the other as Edison and Chung Kah Yan. and they even say we can start a idol drama. haha....

Then night actualy plan to go for a performance in Setapak, but tak jadi, cause going to S's grandma funeral. huh... we know he love his grandma so much. i feel release to see him get to the lost... hope his grandma went to a better place and accompany by angel...

Then yesterday... really really damn angry! huh....

Actuall is a very nice and happy day. i be the workshop emcee for Kit Teo or better know as 張起政. haha... my first time as emcee had given to him~ haha... he is a very nice guy to chat with. and can say, the workshop really do goes well. gethis autograph and have a group picture ith him. and of course my partner, a pretty girl, were so geng lol... she really do a great job in hosting. i think i still have a lot to learn in that! haha...

then when end the event, thats the most damn angry part. that stupid A scolded us, or specificly, me, because i promoted his album in the workshop. excuse me, we had already done so many event in the school, what can do what cannot do you tot we don't know ah? and by the way, who are you? yo are not in charge in our society and event and you seem like 'acting' taking in charge for it. please la, go finish your things before come and diturb other people's event. huh... because of a sentence and only announce once will being caught and sue as being 'rasuah' and can terminate my study or maybe i should sue you for 'distroying' my name and get you fired from you job. which one you think is more easy? my name is very clean and i don't think you can 'terminate' me lol, but as high paid PRODUCER being fired and now work as one of the student affair officer who just know how to worsen student's peoblem... people will know who right and who wrong.

and to the committee for the event, especially someone(s) with high post. first of all, i would like to thank you for giving me a chance to try out the emcee job. i really do enjoy and have fun with it. but to say the true, W you were a nice and flexible person, but you don't have a strong leadership. AD is actually a very good leader, but you were not flexible and you seems unable to accept others opinion. and both of you, think that experience is not important in doing event. really do sorry to say that, both of you guys were wrong. yes, team work is important, and it is same as experience. you have the team work, but without experience to guild you, you can't find your way.. you have experience, and your team is not working together, you sometimes can change the working way. thats the important of the experience. you may die without teamwork, but you surely die without experience. huh.... and you guys know what? i am working with event company now, and i know what their minimum requirement, and it is experience...

huh... anyway, thanks to LY. we really do love you so much. haha... cause you were very understandable and kind in helping us no matter what happen. thank you so much!!! muah.....

huh... and.. tomorrow i am going for another tvc again lol. and in plan, after the tvc will go get myself a hedgehog!! haha.... okok la... bye bye...

Actually is not me....

Huh... now i have the time and energy to write a blog. haha... happy, no happy, anger, everythings mix up in this week. huh... feel kinna wanna kick and kill people currently. haahaa...

At last october is ended... and my life back to normal. huh... october work is such a hell... busy until no time to breath.. huh... until me myself have to help become a promoter. huh... and so angry... 'ooo... your area supervisor is here, he can help to take stock.' my god....! i only work your 1 project ah? huh... no use punya people. really, people is very selfish.. they were unable to see from other people's perceptions....

Then, i make a new hair lol!! new hair style, new look. haha... everyone is so shock to see i change a new hair style. haha... that day go cut hair, actually asked N to straighten my hair, those in front one lal... but he said that make it the 'corn style' is better. and at the end, it look so weird when only those hair in the front look like that. end up make whole hair that style. and i used hours for the hir. huh... and waste hundred for this. hehe... but consider cheap already lah since friend mah. haha.... but hor, until now when i wash my hair, those medicine smell still got oh... huh. dunno when will it gone leh...

Then... back to work. i really disappointed lol. october already ENDED but i still dunno how much is my salary for that particular month. and this month geh salary... still dunno lagi. huh... really feel that stupid F a cannot do a good job. somemore he think i 'wrap mountain wrap ocean'. everything also ask me help. and he like the most, mid night ask me find people to work in the following morning. gila meh. poeple also need to sleep la. huh...

What else? ooo... my Fatty geh daughter give birth to a baby male. but.. is her father who make her pregnant... so scare the baby male will get distortion. hehe... dunno how oh... and my fatty is pregnant now. the daugther's son is now outside the pouch, but he still sucking milk from his mother. haha... very complex geh relationship. nevermind... people who know what actually happen and who is my fatty only understand what i write la. huh...

then school still the same lol... until now ah my assignment i haven't touch anything eh... huh... wanna cry oh!! dunno how to die. haha...

then... dunno how to right lol... love relation problem. huh... i told you, you are the one who can only solve your own problem. you as me to help, i can't help you. i advise you, you don't want to listen, i can't do anything, and you don't want to listen, don't put yourself in the 'self-pity' condition and pity'ing yourself in front of me. you will only get a scold from me..

today super terible bad mood oh... morning only sleep 4 hour. then work macam gila for whole day. and someone(s) still so 'fan'. pity them become my air balloon kena shot. haha.... go home door cannot open and my stupid sister i say the house door cannot open and where are you all, she pandai pandai go ask who lose the door now cannot open etc... geram betul. huh...

Huh....
i really do feel that i am over work currently. emotional very very not stable. huh... have to slow down a bit lol... and relax to let all those 'heat' to spread... haha... and apply my FYP - Animal Assisted Therapy to balance and stabilised my own emotion. haha.... ok lol.. Nite nite~

Lao Huan Tong... Old Kidz...

Huh... working hd been so tiring this few days oh... cause new event starting, and too many promoter is working, not easy to handle so many people at once a... huh... and, not familiar with new project, promoter do wrong, of course, as usual, i am the one who kena shoot lol.. hehe...

to say the true la, dunno why, was born... to be easily accept shooting from others, and of course, i will counter attack back... hehe... my self protecting attitute is very very strong oh... but, huh... working mah.. have to accept upper level geh people to shoot me lo, especially is client side geh people. hehe... thats y i tell my mum today, i want to do my own business, don't want to see other people geh face! haha....

mmm... what else to write la? study been the same, 3 subjects this month, but class for 4 days, and morning to evening. huh... gila punya orang, one lecture 3 hour, want kill people meh... huh...

mmm... and... the topic of the blog... Old kidz... why? suddenly found out this name 'Lao Huan Tong' very suitable for me. dunno why... i am an old kidz... i am not young anymore... as few of my friend who were my age were married. initially one is married today. and she is my very very old friend, who we growth up togeher. but i didn't got to visit her for her dinner. because of work. huh... really feel disappointed for it... dunno why... i just having the feeling not to go... is like it reflecting to me that i am a bit lose in my love life. ya, people will say i am still young. but still... the feeling of love and be loved... i still haven't feel it... huh... everytime i tell myself, Seng, you won't most things in your life, you always lucky no matter in what; social life, work, study... i always get what i want in it. i always get to know who ever that i want to make friend with; i always win in everything that i compete for; i always get the result i want in my study; always get the job that i want and earn the salary i espected.... but... do not get the love life i want... why? sometimes i think Steven say is true, god is very fair. you be good in something, but you also will fall in something. huh... ya... is true... but still... i want to fight it... i want to be good in everything that i want.... maybe... i should fight for my lovelife too... haha... maybe is too early for me; but maybe is too late for me to realise it too........... Lao Huan Tong.... live in his own garden of happiness... protecting himself from outside world which will hurt... and... it suit descripting me...

Everyday me....

Huh... few day no write anything lo. actually this few days also got a lot of things wanna write down, wanna say out... but... dunno how to say out la. huh...

ok lah. firstly, happy things. Steven and Edwin get into the semifinal of the the xiao chao search competition oh!! yeah!! haha... then get to know nick and justin, edwin's friend who also get into semifinal. haha... really feel happy for them lo. but hor, have to work harder lo to get into the final. haha... if not ah, the other will kick u all aside. haha.... congratulation!!!! all the best!!!

then, wha else neh... mmm... work there, my area become bigger this month, but also, more harder for me to control. huh... what to do? want to earn more money, i have to work harder lo. if not? money won't drop from the sky la. hehe... i belief there were god, who look after me. they will know i work hard, and bless me. haha... watch drama too much already lah. EVERYDAY HAPPY AND SMILE, GOOD LUCK WILL ALWAYS COME! haha....

mmm... study... holiday end already lo. huh... class will start on next week la. huh... but i am happy, to say the true. i like to work, but i also like to study. for me, the time for study s very fun and happy. cause... can know a lot of friend lo. then get more knowledge lo.. hehe... but hor, assignment still very menyampah la. hehe..... what to do? study have to do homework mah. hehe... TIME TO BACK TO SCHOOL LIFE~ and back to my beloved room in pj. haha...

what else leh... unhappy... still. don't know why. always feel unhappy, feel lonely. maybe as my mum say, i should go and find a partner la. haha... but still, it won't happen to me currently la. cause... i also don't know what i am finding in my life. haha... now, study is more important, and also gain MONEY. haha... love life, let it be nature la. hehe....

then, huh... always will get some bug kacau'ing me. huh... what to do lo?? pray hard... really. hope i will know more 'good' people in the future lo. hehe... but still, i like to know more people, but i don't like it when people think they know me well. haha... to say the true, even those who know me for ten plus years also can't know me well. even my self. i am someone, who is full with mystery... and my brain always twist faster then the time moving... i also don't know what is my decision and behavior at the next second. haha... to end all... i am a weird person. hehe... but still.. i like myself very much. thank you...

Funny dayz~~

OMG!!! i suddenly wok for another psrt time today!!! as cafe singer. hahahaha.....

haha... today as usual go to wings cafe lol... but the singer not here, replace by another singer, also my friend, name Steve. haha... so long time never meet him already lol. cause i mostly saturday go to wings and he sing other days. funny things happen...

another singer also not here.... and Steve sing alone lo... ask people come up to sing with... one girl sing lo, as present for her friend who birthday. but the most funny things is... after that i go sing lo. and sang until the end of the day... haha...

after first session, another replacement singer is not here yet. Steve called the leader who arrange people to sing, but unable to reach cause he was singing in another cafe today... and S called another people... and the guy said he will tried to arrange another people to come... but waited until second session, no one come yet... and i continue to replace, until the end. haha...

feel so happy. cause starting feel so scare, but later ok di. learn so many things from Steve today. haha.. he is a very experience singer. haha... thanks for giving me a chance for singing on stage for thr whole day... thanks...

Vacation...

Yeah!!! vacation is on the ways yeah!!!!!! going to gemas tomorrow... btw will drop by in Afamosa! Hehe... so happy lo! long time no go vacation. last time go out also go work.. hehe... school holiday can go get un!!! yeah!!!! wait me post up picture ya!! yeah yeah!!!

Mmm... Happiness is my life~

Yeah... exam is going to end lo. so happy oh!! still same, working and studying... what to do? have to support myself staying outside lo. cannot everytime also depend on family mah. haha... but hor... huh.. i think i stay outside use more money than i stay in own house lo. hehe. cause everyday go eat so many things and go sing k. huh... today, or should say yesterday night time go sing k again. Amy go together and i pull Steven go also. huh... is an unplanned programme la. actually tot to go buy present for Alex who birthday tomorrow, or is today. Happy birthday ya old Pa. then can't buy anything in mid valley, decided to buy him a cake and give him a supprise la... then suddenly say want go sing k. Steven said don't want to go, but still pulled by us to go... huh... i think this time he really get angry edi lo.. cause everytime also like that. huh... Di, sorry la. next time we or i should say, i won't do again la. don't angry lo... love u so much. haha... really promise won't do again la...

mmm...dunno la... sometimes oh, really feel worthless staying in this world. why people have to life, study and work, married and give birth, then old, and death? human are born to death, friends are meet to separate, we study to work... huh... what a distorded thinking i am having... must be the stress of exam and work. haha... dunno lah... sometimes i feel heart to heavy to stay happy around... huh... but as what i am, always look at the bright side... life have to live happily, study so we get a better work, meet and appreaciate friends so will not disappointed when separated... haha... as i always tell people... no matter how dark is it, there is always a light around it. find it, and moves thoughward it... give ourself a little bit hope, it is not very hard to do. no matter how unhappy something make us to be, always see from the bright side... there is always a reason for something bad to happen. haha... this is what i belief, that make me feel relax and happy everydayz...

Darkness and Light...

huh... sometimes really fel unhappy with friends attitude. mmm... should how to say it? can say that one of the theory that i study in child development, 'child egoentrism' in piaget's theory actually still exist in adulthood. is just that it appear in different from... or i should say it as 'selffishness'... people always only will look at their own side. very often they will consider other people's situation. support what i said?

example one... people always borrow money from other people. problem is if the money is for urgent use ie education, medication, still can be understand. but borrow money to go vacation, play, i can't think the reason to lend to this type of people. is not outside people, is someone who very close to me. problem is, i am working and studying at the same time, and i have to support my breakfast, lunch, dinner, petrol, room rent and school fees. and you were staying in own house. and want to lend money from me to go out play... is it a little too over for that?

example two... when you were busy studying, and you said something that offended me. that is when you need me, you will look for me. now i am having exam and i am working at the same time. you look for me to help you on something that become important because you postpone it for a long time. and why can't i just tell you that i am busy study and will look for you when i wanted to help you instead of make time to help you solve your problem? maybe i am too weak... i should treat you as what ou treated me last time... but i didn't... still, sometimes i will have the thinking that you always used me for your own purpose... you will not look for me, beside when you need my help... 'egocentrism'... only look at own perspective...

example three... when something wrong happen, everyone will say their own never do anything wrong. everything is other people's fault... is that true? please, think twice before you say the word. look at your own heart, as him, is that other people's fault? people is like that. as what a malay proverb sound 'gajah di depan tak nampak, kuman di seberang nampak'... or direct translation as 'you can't see the elephant in front of you but you see the bacteria on the other side'... from the sentence i think everyone will understand what it means... yes, no matter how big is the mistake that one person make, they will never see it. but no matter how small a problem causes by others, it will be seen as big problem... still, 'egocentrism' happen...

so, agree with me that piaget's theory children egocentrism actually still exist in adult? the answer is 'yes'. like the private speech turning into inner talk, the egocentrism perception also change into inner egocentrism, only think about own self...