Backed... to my wonder world...

t last is the end of the month.. and as said.. i had officially resign from the company.. and going back to my old wonderful world. haha... happy or sad.. is hard to know. hard to define... hard to speak out... a lot of things had happen... happy and sad... anger and moddy... everything just rush back to me in once... haha...

想试着努力的洒脱，一转身眼泪却在流。。。离开之前忍著眼泪收著最后的防线。

i like this 2 sentence a lot. is from 2 different songs, but from the same singers. haha.. both i know them, and these songs is writen by them, two of them.
when ever we wanna run away from something, we actualy huting our ownself.. that is why 'we try as hard to run away, to release, but still our tears is droping just at the corner'...
when we tried to release something, we will always show that we are strong enough to face it, thats why we always keep our tears, and we seems not disturbed by it... that is why 'before we go away, we hold our tears, and we keep our last blockage.' to show that we did not bother by the incident. haha...

back to myself...
Hehe... i had make a glasses lol.. at last. haha... actually i had some sight problem la.. 'shan guang'.. light brightness problem.. just a very mild problem. but i think it do disturb my studies, as i can't see the word on the projector's screen. huh... thats y i went with one of my close friend to make the glasses... together. and guess what? she used up to 2 hour to choose her glasses. haha.. of course, including giving me opinion la for my glasses as well. haha..

studying psychology really make me seeing things carefully, and from different point of view... but it also making me hard to make a decision... as i will always see from more than 2 point of view... huh... really hard for me to adapt... hard to know what is true and what is false, what is good and what is bad... what is real and what is illusion... in front of me.....

currently one incident happen. some one close to me actually remind me of the true of human personality... what we see with our eye sometimes is not true... there is some hidden secret that can't seen by the eyes... my closed friends think that i get closed too soon... with a friend that i know currently. and i too trusted this friend of my, although we did not know for very long time. and i think most of people close to me knows, i will always treat people that i trust with my heart... and they scared that i will be hurt.... maybe... but... still, i believing him... dunno why. maybe is the feeling... maybe is his personality... maybe i just feel to trust him... haha... anyway... i trusted you. haha...

then... another incident happen la between me and another friend, huh... this is a very funny... and terrible things that shouldn't happen. haha... and i also feel so suprise.. and shock.. after get to know it from a closed friend of mine. she told me that someone confronted her that the particular person fall in love with.. erhem... me. and... huh.. i also what to say la. just that we shouldn't have this type of feeling, and this type of relationship. i know about this earlier... but i don't belief that th particular person brave enough to confront it to my friend... very closed to me. haha... shock... and dunno should laugh or cry. haha......

huh... currently been singing in a cafe in Setapak. haha... new experient.. cause singing with a female partner. haha... thanks a lot for taking care yo, Ling. haha... thanks a lot.

on the way... back to my wonderful life...

Currently i am moving back to my life... the wonderful life i had before i work in the office... back to my freelances work... acting here and acting there... singing here and singing there... and currently... photograph taking as well. haha...

To say the true, currently my life have been back to a slightly a little bit more normal comparing to before this. haha... why? because i had really... really resign for the office job... i feel that a big huge stone had been released from my body... my heart... and my emotions. haha... still... i am stil adjusting myself to this enviroment... the old world which i had currently... totally forgoten. haha...

Currently had started to go shooting again... as a student in form 3... haha... sometimes i think is a little too old for me to be a form 3 student... haha... but my dear father say he is very confident for me to be that. haha... and... of course i went and be lol. haahaa... and is quite funny as well. haha... as my mandarin is not that fluent speaking, haha... really does look like a secondary studeti assume. haha... is quite a good experience as usually i will be asked to be customer, office boy, or pass-by'er... and this time is a great challenge for me to be a secondary student. and really thanks to my dear father who give me this opportunity. haha... and thanks again as it is a few times job. haha...

Then... another person i have to thanks is Ling Ling... haha... thanks for bringing me to sing in the prima setapak cafe. i think i did a bad job singing that day... cause had been long time not singing already.. and.. all is new songs that mostly never sang before in cafe. haha... especially that 'zao zhi dao ai'... huh... sing like ghost crying.. haha... but still... thanks to Ling Ling for giving me a chance to back to the singing life. haha... thanks a lot...

Looking back to my photo in friendster which already 2 years and maybe more than that... my life really do filled with a lot of fun, happy, sadness, anger, hate... and... love. haha... thanks everyone for showing up yourself in my life... no matter you pop up in front of me, of just msn'ing with me, or sms'ing or thru calling... thanks everyone for giving me a wonderful life~ thank you very much. i appreciate everyone that walk into my life~~~

Released... Fly away......

very tired and boring and moody and... all negative feeling filled in me. huh... really... i wish i have a pair of wing... fly away from everything that i don't like. huh...

work had been growthfrom bad to worse... now i really cannot stand in these enviroment. and i had officially asked myself to resign..

this few weeks had happen a lot of things.. really... make me really unhappy working in this company. last time is because i like to do event a lot, thats y i work in this company. but now, the urge for work is not here, negative feeling is growing more compare to the liking...

first of all... why everytime when i asked for off day, at the end there sure you all will arrange work for me? is not first time... is already second and third time... always says that off day we should off, but at last asked me back for work...
then... said that will choose good part timer to attend training. and at last, what we have here? newbies who never work before, and find people from the internet. thats consider a professional... ya... then i think i should resign my job...
always last minute job for us. had said that we should not get involve in this job and that job. and at last, what ever that can't settle on time, just throw it to us. and blame us for what ever problem that occur... good never get appraise, bad always get complain. what you want us to do? why don't you just ask them to settle and finish up their job from throwing it to us when they can't finish it?
what ever job that you guys arrange me to do i never settle? complain complain... is there any time that i will run away from my job? did i put my job aside and run away before it is settle? no.. and never... for what to complain? is it wrong for me to settle my job fast? if you guys like people who do their job slowly and can't do anything while blaming other people for the fault, then you find the wrong person to work with. i really dun understand why... is it fault for me to settle my job fast and hand over those other's job back to them to settle? wait there and be a vase, wasting time? thats what u want then i think you better find few more people like that stupid fat pig!
and lastly, stupid fat pig! what had i did to you? until you want to be a two headed snake, complaining me to people who were just walking next to me? you tell me to settle it with my way, and just few second call to another person complaining about me... you really do let me see your real face... protecting yourself and push all the blame to other people, seems you are not involve in it... huh... just one day... i belief you will get back the pay from ll you had done, to me and to the others people...
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curently know a lot of people... get friends from all over Malaysia. had some in kota bharu, batu pahat... and of course KL here as well. all known not for long, but i think they were better from those i face to face everyday, and being two head snakes type. had a little guy come down here from KB to study. haha... i know you were quit boring here cause friends were not studying in the same class with you. ya, find a day to bring you out walk walk in KL as i promised you. haha... the a mummy in Batu Pahat as well. everytime i talk with you from phone also feel very excited, i think you more excited than me la. haha... until can cry... hope you children all healthy and well~~
then my Baby in KL. don't always argue with you mummy la. we always say, you always say your mummy this and that, but in heart you love her so much. hehe... maybe sometimes just try to be a little manja with her as what you did when you with us, things might just be a little more better. haha... as you see, you know me and the other not long. but because of your funny attitude, we like you so much~ haha...

i had resign from my work... and they had asked me to stay for another month... this is the final last time i help you... i had been to good hearted to stay this long in the company... and i do had been very very tired... huh...

btw, for my honey who might just drop by to read my blog, how are you currently ya? got argue with your superior ka? haha... had been long time never chat with u lol... haha... don't worried about me after reading my blog. maybe i seems to be a weak person from outside, but inner, i am much more stronger. haha... find a day we chat ya! haha...

bye bye...