forever... together...

huh... why do i always started my blog with a 'huh' word? haha.. weird lol... or maybe already is a habit for me. hahaa...

mmm... i found out i had a very bad habit. thats when i feel my head is itchy, i will scratch it with my finger.. and because my skin is a bit sensiti, it will easily get injured and my finger will be 'colored' wit my blood. haha.... then only i would go and take bath!! haha... ok, it does not happen frequently... just sometimes la.. as everyone know i am a very 'clean' person who would bath early in the morning when i wake up, bath again in the noon when i feel hot or sticky due to sweat, and night time before i sleep! haha... and i remember last time when i was small, i would keep wash my head whenever i feel my head itchy... haha... i mean even after i bath i feel my hair is not clean i would go and wash my hair at the basin... wakaka... what a weird habit... haiz...

mmmm... this few days is quite a busy and crazy day. haha... a night before my exam i go and sing in a cafe, go to yam cha with my fellow friend, and only back at my room is ss2 at 2pm and start to read my book for the exam... and i does get enough sleep wher ei only sleep for about 2 hours, and go for the exam, continue hang out with my friend, and night time go and sing in the same cafe again as replacement and my singing is really terrible on the second day due to all those bad bad bad situations... haiz... but anyhow, the second day the enviroment in the cafe is starting to s* as the customer is having their birthday party there and it is teriblely noisy until we can't even hear our own voice projected by the monitor! great... no matter how worse we sing, no one would notice because everyone can't liste to our singing! but still feel a bit guilty for not doing my job well. huh...

today is a funny day that kien call me in the morning asking bout our trip! and i tell him whether we can go later or not because i wanted to sleep for another 2 hours since i had not been sleep good for 2 days. haha... of course, at the end we cancel the plan. and plan to bird park but cancel again due to some problem. haiz... don't say anymore. then at last we had our steamboat dinner in amy's house. 6 of us there, where most of them don't know each other. haha... anyway, i think is fun today as... we abuse ourself with the food!!! wakaka... we play card and whoever that lose need to eat the same amount of food with te card on hand. haha.... everyone is crazy because over float with the food intake! haha.....

and currently the most terrible problem that haunting me is my sister's love life lol.. huh... both of them is so so so terrible.... for what lah disturbing me with both of your's problem? settle it by youself la.. huh... just tell each other what is in your mind, don't always think i am the middle person. and i don't think you guys want me to open my mouth... as your all know, if i open, i would just scold both of you with no mercy, as usual. huh.. now, i just wait.. until i reach my limit, i would give you two the 'best advise' huh... and i know the limit is coming soon~~~

and finally... tomorrow i would be going to malacca... haha.... at last i am out station for a short trip! haiz.. had been plan for so long, but no one corperate with me for that. haha... now... is the start for my malaysia whole town visitation! haha.... yeah!!! lets move on!!!

moral story behind...

today go shopping and go sing k with amy lol... tomorrow she is going to exam, but still want go hang out! haiya! geng ah!!! wakaka... she bought a lot of things oh! and i also same la... not a lot like her. bought a dvd....a ghost story. Muoi... i think some of you watched it cause it show in the cinema before. but i do not have chance to go watch! haha... and saw it selling cheap today in the store. haha....
mmm...
the story bout a guy got a girl friend
he ask peole go rape his girlfriend
cause he is dating with another girl
then the girl's bestfriend also like that guy
and she is a writer
then the bad girl and the guy tell the bestfriend tipu punya news
and the bestfriend write it into a book because jeolousy
then the poor girl awaken a curse to punish them after a few years when she regain back her strength from the incident
the poor girl sacrified herself to awake the curse
and let the ghost to possess her bestfriend to balas dendam
the bestfriend aka the ghost back to korea and kill the bad girl and the guy
haiz...
end of the story
the guy is very handsome, but do such a bad thing
and the poor girl also very tall and pretty
korea actress and actor all very 'good quality'
haha
moral of the story is that...
'don't do bad things. maybe you were not punished on that time. that doesn't mean you can run away from the justice. anyhow you will be punished for doing the bad things.'

the end of today's blog.

Wonderful...

Had been thinking the reason for many many time, many many days, many many month....
why it become bad to worse??
at last i realised it....

today went to sing k with chien, cyee and kien. had a wonderful night having fun with them as always. haha... no wonder we are a geng from secondary to now! because we are playful and crazy! haha... a geng need to consist many many characteristic. haha.... thats correct...

suddenly realise this when i am singing one of my favarite song which had been long forgotten... 'firework' or 'yan huo'... i found my sound were different singing this song comparing to the other song... suddenly, all the memory come to me...

the first time i sing 'zhuan shu tian shi' on stage...
the whole year which i were giving chance to sing this song on stage...
the time when i singing 'yan huo' in a performance...
the time when i sing 'zhuan shu tian shi' while working on stage...
the comment that a friend of mine told me when i was playing on the stage...
the comment the same friend give me when i was working on the same stage...
the word one of my best friend said in k while she asked me to sing 'yan huo'...
the talks that we have when i chat with all my cafe singer friends...
the words that one of the cafe singer scolded me because some silly things i did...
and at last...
i realise the reason...
why i do not have the intention, the emotion and the feeling...
which i have when i was playing on the stage...
but not there when i was working on the same stage...
is because...
i am singing...
because i need to sing...
but not singing...
because i want to sing...
thats the different...
i am happy...
i am sad...
because i realise the reason...
and know the fault i made....
one day...
i will return...
with the starting me...
who sing...
because he wanted to sing so much on the stage...
i promise....

lonely night... lovely hour...

had been hanging around with few i consider as long lost friend this 2 days. nothing special, just hanging around, eating, and crazying almost any topic we chat...even meet a 'long lost' friend in msn which had been almost few year not contacting with each other. haha...

exam is coming soon. but i am not in the mood of studying. why? i not sure. i think i am in the phobia... phobia of getting graduated... graduate means jobless. haha... i need to plan for my future starting today. i don't want to wait until the last minute only think about this. scare that i will lost most my friend now after we graduate. scare about almost everything... everything that go into my mind.

listening to the 'powerful mind' cd. did it calm me down? i not sure. but i know i do in the calm emotional state, as usual when i am alone in my own room. always...

everything seems to be stop in the mid air.. but time is still ticking around my ear.. what can i do? i need to move a faster step in front to catch up with everything that i had drop in the past. i need to move forward... to be back the real me...

i am looking... i am looing for someone who able to break the stone castle and touched my heart... someone who walk besides me, not behind me. haha... when the person will appear in front of me? i don't know... only god know~~~ future ahead me... here i come!!!